Yes, yes I know. It's the end of May. March is such a long time ago now. I would have liked to write this blog post in April but it clearly didn't happen. I think part of it was because of what I learned during that month. I was scared to admit some sort of failure. I've decided to put the fear aside and be honest with myself and all of you. I'm sorry it didn't happen in my timeline or possibly yours. I truly believe that I wrote when it was the right time. There could have been more to learn or it's possible I just wasn't ready. Sometimes our own deadlines and expectations are unrealistic. It's easy to make promises but it can be harder to keep them.
I've realized how much I needed the March Manifesting to open my eyes. Once the month was over, I noticed that I wasn't manifesting. I had written these wonderful things down but was not putting some of them into practice. I had the illusion that I already had and was smooth sailing. It was enlightening to see the lies I was telling myself. Did it make me feel better? Maybe a little but not enough. I realize now that it's partly the cause of some unhappiness. This disappointment in myself for not being the lie I tried to believe. I know I'm not the only one who feels this. I know we can be very hard on ourselves. We don't benefit from this. A source of this is a lack of trust in ourselves.
There was and continues to be a conscious awareness of how I am living my life. I'm really taking a look at my behaviors, habits and decisions. I'm starting to question myself. I want to know how much I really am happy with each item. If it doesn't bring much happiness then I start to look at other options and ways to deal with the situation. It can be hard to let go of things we've been holding onto for a long time. I have to remind myself that this is always a mourning process. Even if it means letting go of something you don't want anymore. Allow yourself to grieve. I know, it's hard. It's the only way to let go and come out stronger on the other side. Trust yourself to know that if it doesn't feel like love, it's not right.